my open tears

sometimes what we wish for
is beyond our reach..
thats why they are called wishes...
but i believe that
life is full of hopes
i have to hold on to them
so that i can move on
the road ahead is a long one

have faith, you.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

hhmm..
i know i said i wasnt going to blog till my exams ends
but just now i received a call from my sec sch friend.
and what she told me
has put me in a shock.
even now im still shocked.

back in secondary school
i had a crush on this guy.
he was a year older then me
i was in sec 3 then while he was in sec 4
he and the husband of another friend of mine
were good friends.
just now she called me saying,

her: aslin.. kau ingat GEL tak? (aslin.. u remember GEL?)
me: GEL aper? (what GEL?)
her: GEL lah.. yg kau suka dulu tu... (GEL lah.. the one u like last time)
me: oh.. GEL itu. ah.. kenapa? (oh.. that GEL. ah.. why?)
her: dia meninggal tau last sunday. (he passed away last sunday)
me: silent.
her: oi.. kau dgr tak? (oi.. u hear or not?)
me: ah.. dengar. kau betul ni? kenapa? mcm mana? (yes.. serious? why, how?)
her: dia kena langgar ngan kereta. (he got hit by a car)
me: ah...ok. silent.
her: and kau tahu tak? dia ada simpan gambar kau lah
and dia ader bilang azmi yg that time dia pun suka kau.
(and u know.. he got keep ur picture and he told azmi
that he liked you too)
me: ye ke? entah lah.. eh, rai. aku tak pernah cakap hi kat dia.
i never had a chance to talk or say hi to him...
(really? dunno eh.. eh, rai, i never said hi to him)

hhmm...
i am still in shocked.
not because that he used to like me or whatever.
but because i never had a chance to said hi
or talk to him..
maybe if i did.. haiz.
time is really short.
i told syg.
and he said, his time was up.
dont remember the sad things.
just remember the funny things that happened.
ya.. i will..

you know how we came up with the nickname GEL?
his hairstyle that time was so neat.
he put like dunno how many gel on his hair ah.
so we called him GEL..
and everytime he happens to be around our area,
my friends will say, eh GEL.. GEL follow me..
and my face will go so so red.
his name is Faizal.

ok. shall not think of it further.
by the way, 2 papers are done.
3 more to go.
monday and it will be over.
hang on minah.

her teardrops...10:45 PM

Thursday, November 22, 2007

woke up with a slight fever today..
but i think it has gone down.
dunno why but im feeling super cold nowadays.
must be the weather.
been studying at home, school and at the library
no choice.

im worried that i wont be able to pass.
especially my science mods.
stoo-piiid.
qns on DNA? Carbohydrates? Sea Currents?
Density of water? Ekman Spiral?
like what...???
see, so much for trying to be well-rounded.
just two science mods
and im feeling like way shit...
come on..
the last time i touched chemistry was like in sec4
and biology? like i never even took it ar.
crap.
ok. no point complaining.
i have to do it anyway.

and..
i just realise that my exam dates are
so close to each other.
crap.
i have 4 papers next week!
27th, 28th
30th,1st.
can buy 4D oreadi.
haha.

oh.
i cannot believe england is out.
serves them right anyway.
they dont deserve to go in.
but england not in?
thats like crazy..
another stoo-piid thing.
crap.

ok.
will stop here.
its back to the library tmr with caca..
and i guess most probably i wont be blogging
till the end of my exams
so dun miss me...
hah.

her teardrops...10:46 PM

Sunday, November 18, 2007

okays...
this entry is way late.
just want to say thank you
to all those who wished me happy birthday..
hehe.
yes...
and also thanks for the presents.
lurve them all..
i can open a body shop outlet at home oreadi.
hehee..
kidding..

hhmm..
im really feeling damn tired.
was busy yesterday and today.
my cousin got married.
so it was really hectic.
and i wasnt prepared to help with the wedding
i wore the wrong shoes..
so there was i in high heels walking here and there
clearing tables..
wrong choice of shoes.
i think im going to wear flats to weddings
from now on.
hahha.

and i realise that exams is like so coming.
eerr.. crap.
im so dead.
have to start studying.
chet...

e e r r r . . . . .
taaaaa....

her teardrops...9:11 PM

Friday, November 16, 2007

hehe..
its my birthday today!!!
hhmm..
happy that its my birthday.
i survived another year.
but i realise im getting old..
ya.. 22 years old.
hhmm..
im still 18.
hehe.
ok.

so yesterday caught the bee movie
at johor with my parents.
damn farnee movie.
so cute lah the bee.
haha.

ouh...
before i left to meet syg just now,
ika gave me my birthday cake!!!
hehe.
birthdays arent the same without a cake.
hehe.
and so i cut it and made my wish.
cant tell you though what the wish is..
hehe.

anyway, watched the game plan with syg just now.
very heartwarming movie.
farnee too and the last part was kinda sad
although it has a good ending in the end.
hehe.
and so..
syg bought me that dkny watch.
ya seh.
he really bought it.
like he's crazy dah.
i cannot believe it.
no wonder he's so bankrupt now.
i kinda feel bad.
hhmm...
lurve you lah syg..
not because you bought me the watch
but because you actually
notice what i was saying.
hehe.

the birthday cake... yummy!

the birthday girl with the cake. hehe.

receiving my present! yeah!!!

that dkny watch. its mine now. hehe.

the mat kental. (i forced him to button the top for the pic) hehe..

and yes.. me taking in the whole birthday mood...

thanks syg for the watch... hehe.

so my birthday is going to be over

in like 10 minutes..

hhmmm..

oh well... 22 pun 22 lah kan..

haha.

her teardrops...11:46 PM

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

went for my birthday dinner with the family on monday...

an early one that is.

hehe.

well.. its the only day the whole family's schedule is good.

and so it was off to sakura downtown east.

as always.. brother is so happy to eat there.

i think the amount and variety of food makes him smile.

and i was contented enough to get my soup.

hehehe.

and thinking back,

we stayed like for 2 and a half hours..

so full seh.

ok..

let the pictures do the talking..

bro, ika and mum...

hehe. my new 'friend'.

look at his face...

two crazy people full and nothing better to do...

and yes.. the family picture. i had to make sure we take it. heh.

oh.. i almost forgot to mention this..
we had a breathing exercise in lecture
during education..
our lecturer insisted that
we close our eyes and breathe in deeply
and exhale..
and she even had music on.
those peaceful kind of music...
yah..
so the kewl.
ok.

she was saying..
the stress comes from the mind.
and we should not allow it to control us.
so ya... its all the mind.
push it out of our mind.
ya..
so people..
its the mind!!!
ok. im crazy.
oh.. i have a test tmr.
damn.
ok.

alright.. signing off.. yours truly... hehe.

her teardrops...2:52 PM

Friday, November 09, 2007

went to ps in the morning with mum..
while dad was off to meet his workers,
we walked around
and dear mum bought me my birthday presents..
heh.
early birthday presents...
2 tops and a necklace all from chomel.
mum seems to like the shop.
its like
'baju ni lawa.. eh, rantai ni, bag ni pun lawa'
(this top nice, necklace, bag also nice)
ya.. and thats how i ended up buying them.
i realise im pretty much influenced by my mum.
heh.
which is a good thing i guess.
i was torn between the two tops
and mum said, just buy both.
hehe. grins...
will take a picture of the two tops when i put it on..

i have kind of a long break from school.
yesterday to monday.
and im so not complaining.
hehe.
next week is like the last week of the semester
ya seh.. then its the exams.
like can you believe it?
i just feel like the semester just started
oh well..
its a short sem.
still... im not complaining.
and since next week is the last week,
it also means that exams are so coming.
and i have a test next thursday.
crap.
ok. no worries.
will just do what i have to do.

im thinking of what movie to watch on my birthday..
what is good?
any recommendations???
hhmm..
and i so cant wait to see what suprise syg has for me.
he likes to give me suprises
but it all never really quite turn out
as a suprise.
hehe.
but sometimes it did lah..
like the sunflowers he sent to my house last year.
and the top he bought secretly.
so the sweet.
ok.
lets see what suprise im going to get on my birthday.
heh.

okies.
will stop here.
till my next entry.
ouh.. man u won.
heh.

her teardrops...8:20 PM

Tuesday, November 06, 2007

i am happy.

hehe.

want to know why???

hehe.

cos i have finished my ritual paper.

haha.

and want to know something else..

the paper is.. full.. of... CRAP.

haha.

ok.. seriously i dunno what i wrote.

and im so not going to edit it

cos if i do..

it will not be finish and worse thing

is that it is still full of crap..

hehe.

ok. stop.

and i had a great day with him yesterday.

went to sentosa.

it was so unplanned.

we were eating at bk vivo

when he suddenly said let go sentosa..

ya.

so off we went..

first time taking the monorail.

ya. the last time i went sentosa was like

last december!

haha.

and the ticket lady thinks we are tourists.

haha. ok. tourists it is then.

watched the sunset too.

so romantic right?

haha.

ok. crap.

in the monorail..

her teardrops...8:15 PM

Sunday, November 04, 2007

hhmm...
its raining while im typing this.
a bit cold..
and i think its a great weather to sleep in.
but i dont think my sleep will be good later..
having a bad stomachache
and a spinning headache.
have been eating too much spicy food
and the stomach cannot take it..
chet.
this is bad.

and man u managed to draw yesterday.
hhmm..
would love for them to win
but oh well..
credit to arsenal for fighting back
there's still plenty more games to come.
so we'll see.

i so dont feel like going to school.
have a stooppiiddd presentation
at 8 in e morning.
like i haven wake up ar.
but oh well..
i shall just look forward to meeting the bf
after school.
yes.. i guess then time will pass by faster.
ok.

ttaa...

her teardrops...11:01 PM

Thursday, November 01, 2007

okok.

im gonna update..

been gone for a week or so

and so many photos coming up..

heh.

and i think im even more tired now

then i was during my last entry.

crap.

like i dunno why..

the tiredness keep on accumulating.